Category
Category: Business
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Business
Office In Crisis After Work Husband Tim And Work Wife Sarah Announce They Are Getting A Divorce
The whole office is talking after beloved work husband and work wife Tim and Sarah announced their separation, forcing coworkers to divide up coffee…
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Science & Technology
Terror Alert: Taliban Claims Responsibility For Destroying Jeff Bezos’ Blue Origin Rocket
The group said its long-running campaign against private spaceflight had achieved a major victory after a billionaire's rocket completed most of the work itself.
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Business
‘We Know You Need A Battery Right Now’: RadioShack Returns After Discovering Americans Still Panic-Buy One Weird Adapter
RadioShack has returned after discovering Americans still need a physical store for one weird battery, one weird adapter, and a man named Dennis.
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Business
Red Lobster Denies Using Industrial Dye To Make Lobster Look Redder
Red Lobster denies using an industrial coloring agent to make lobster look aggressively red after former kitchen employees describe a suspicious Crimson Spectrum.
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Life & Style
North Korea Opens Beach Resort For Foreigners Who Miss Being Told Exactly Where To Stand
North Korea pitches a beach resort to burned-out foreigners seeking seafood, patriotic murals, and the strange luxury of having every decision made for them.
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Business
Denny’s Announces New “Freedom Tap” Program Allowing Customers To Fill Any Container They Bring With Pancake Syrup
Denny's new Freedom Tap lets customers fill any reasonable vessel with syrup, immediately testing breakfast liberty.
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Life & Style
Heritage Dry: Johnson & Johnson Brings Back Real Talc After Deciding America Has Become Too Afraid Of A Little Powder
The relaunch leans into patriotic dryness, powder holsters, and customers who say cornstarch never produced the bathroom cloud they were raised to respect.
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Science & Technology
Reassuring: AI Slop Is Okay Now As Long As Everyone Agrees The Hands Are A Brand Choice
Marketing leaders say the public has matured past accuracy, proportion, readable copy, and whatever is happening to that dentist’s wrist.
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Life & Style
Chanel Launches Pay In 4, A New Fragrance For Women Who Want To Smell Expensive During A Klarna Dispute
The new scent reportedly blends bergamot, white musk, smoked vanilla, and one base note listed only as pending approval.
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Business
Bad Look: Guzman y Gomez Launches 5 A.M. Drive-Thru Tequila Menu For Hungover Tradies
Guzman y Gomez has launched a 5 a.m. drive-thru hard-liquor and paired-food menu for hungover tradies, insisting every Breakfast Margarita is responsible because it…
