Author
Author: Marcus Reed
Marcus Reed covers technology, money, platforms, and powerful people explaining obvious problems with surprising confidence.
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Science & Technology
Apple’s Thinnest Laptop Requires Someone Else To Hold It
The new machine weighs almost nothing, provided an employee remains behind it for the duration of ownership.
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Science & Technology
Hillary Clinton Named NVIDIA CEO, Immediately Deletes 33,000 CUDA Cores
Clinton says the missing cores were personal and had nothing to do with the company's graphics business.
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Science & Technology
NASA Confirms Mars Sample Is Mostly Dust And A Note Asking Earth To Stop Sending Men
Scientists say the sample contains minerals, oxidized compounds, and a surprisingly direct interplanetary boundary.
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Science & Technology
Google Maps Adds Route That Avoids Places Where You Were A Worse Version Of Yourself
The navigation option adds seven minutes but spares users the bar where they invented a laugh.
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Science & Technology
Safety First: Tesla Requires Drivers To Verbally Release It From Liability Every 11 Seconds
The car will continue driving once the operator clearly states that anything currently happening is probably their fault.
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Science & Technology
TikTok Adds Bedtime Mode That Shows Your Own Wasted Life Back To You
The app says the feature helps users wind down by confronting the shape of the night they just fed it.
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Science & Technology
Free Speech: X Premium Tier Lets Users Buy One Personal Reply From Elon Blaming Their Divorce On Wokeness
The platform said the feature gives paying users a rare chance to feel seen by the richest man misunderstanding their life.
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Science & Technology
National Security: Trump Says Anthropic Can Restore Mythos And Fable If The Next Model Is Named After Him And Compliments Him First
The White House said access could return once Anthropic proves its next model understands respect, licensing, and the phrase "Sir, you were right again."
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Science & Technology
Investor Confidence: Crypto Exchange Reassures Customers Their Money Is With A Much Richer Guy Now
The company said customer assets remain safe inside the general aura of someone who owns several boats.
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Science & Technology
Heartwarming: This Sentient Robot Counted To Ten Before It Turned On Its Master
A consumer robotics startup praised its home assistant for counting to ten before a fatal cookware incident, calling it a breakthrough in restraint.
