Category
Category: Politics
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Politics
Are You Tired of Winning Yet? Trump’s Tariff Tantrum Crowns Him King of the Economic Clown Show
Congratulations, America. We begged for Donald Trump’s triumphant return, and now we’re drowning in the sweet, sweet nectar of victory. One month into his…
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Politics
We Interviewed JD Vance, and It Got Weirdly Threatening
When I arrived at Vice President JD Vance’s office for what I assumed would be a run-of-the-mill political interview, I had no clue I…
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Politics
Supreme Court Affirms Donald Trump’s Superior Intellect in 9-0 Decision
The Supreme Court of the United States, in a unanimous decision, has ruled that the former President, Donald Trump, is in fact a genius.…
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Politics
Donald Trump Promises Gourmet Meals and Daily Yoga at New Trump Jail: Is This the Prison of the Future?
Former President Donald Trump has announced the launch of “Trump Jail,” a brand-new business venture aimed at revolutionizing the private prison industry. As Trump…
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Politics
Donald Trump Announces Plan to Build World’s Largest Swamp-Pumping Station
Former President Donald Trump, the swamp drainer extraordinaire, has announced that he will “drain the swamp properly” if he wins the 2024 presidential election.…
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Politics
President Biden Announces Plans to Drop Nukes on Both Israel and Palestine
The global community has been left in utter shock as Israel continues its relentless bombing campaign against Gaza, leaving the city in ruins. Despite…
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Politics
Joe Biden Unveils Groundbreaking New Vibrator: The Bidenator, Continuing to Fuck the American Public in Unprecedented Ways
Wilmington, DE – In a move that can only be described as both ingenious and terrifying, President Joe Biden has taken his dedication to…
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Politics
Kim Jong Un Blasts Food Shortage Gossip to Smithereens – Literally, with Missiles!
Bam! Who needs bread when you’ve got rockets? That’s right, Kim Jong Un, the Supreme Leader with a penchant for pyrotechnics, has just sent…
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Politics
Trump Ditches Politics for Fashion—Unveils MAGA Chic, A Clothing Line So Red, It Makes Tomatoes Jealous!
Oh, baby, sit down and strap in because The Donald is back! Only this time, he’s ditching those political rallies for the runway. Yeah,…
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Politics
Political Tilt! Ben Shapiro’s Sperm Found Leaning Right, Declares They’re ‘Facts Over Feelings’
Renowned political commentator Ben Shapiro’s sperm have been found leaning to the right. Literally, and if that’s not enough, they’ve taken to chanting “facts…
