Tag
Tag: Elon Musk
Running jokes
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Science & Technology
Safety First: Tesla Requires Drivers To Verbally Release It From Liability Every 11 Seconds
The car will continue driving once the operator clearly states that anything currently happening is probably their fault.
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Science & Technology
Free Speech: X Premium Tier Lets Users Buy One Personal Reply From Elon Blaming Their Divorce On Wokeness
The platform said the feature gives paying users a rare chance to feel seen by the richest man misunderstanding their life.
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Science & Technology
Investor Relations: SpaceX Announces Free Handjobs For Anyone Who Gets In Before The IPO
The company said fleece vests no longer captured the depth of shareholder gratitude.
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Science & Technology
Elon Musk Furious After Losing Chess Match To OpenAI Chatbot That Kept Asking ‘Are You Sure?’
Elon Musk reportedly loses a private chess match to an OpenAI chatbot that kept calmly asking whether he was sure about his moves.
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Science & Technology
Former White Castle Employees Say Elon Musk Spent The Mid-’90s Carrying A Bucket Of ‘White Sauce’ And Calling It Humanity’s Backup Plan
Former White Castle coworkers allegedly remember the billionaire as an overnight-shift sauce visionary with a bucket, a population chart, and no respect for refrigeration.
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Science & Technology
Bad News: Court Says Elon Musk Waited Too Long To Be This Much Of A Loser About OpenAI
After losing his OpenAI lawsuit, Elon Musk must continue his Sam Altman breakup tour on X, where there is no filing deadline for being…
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Science & Technology
xAI Announces New “Earn While You Grok” Program After Internal Data Shows Most Users Only Open App By Accident
PALO ALTO, Calif. — After months of struggling to gain traction against OpenAI, Anthropic, Google, and what one executive privately described as “three guys…
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Science & Technology
Elon Musk Announces Starlink Upgrades, Here’s What It Means For Your Sex Toys
HAWTHORNE, CA – Elon Musk has announced sweeping upgrades to the Starlink satellite network that he says will deliver internet speeds “approaching the speed…
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Science & Technology
Musk Demands OpenAI Return To Being Weird Little Nonprofit Nobody Understood
OAKLAND, Calif. – The federal courtroom overseeing the increasingly hostile legal dispute between Elon Musk and OpenAI briefly paused Wednesday after both parties attempted…
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Science & Technology
Elon Musk Unveils X Premium Genetics, Allows Subscribers To Receive “Verified” Elon Sperm Directly Through App
AUSTIN, Texas — Elon Musk announced Monday that X will officially enter the fertility industry with the launch of X Premium Genetics, a subscription-based…
