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Tag: Twitter
Running jokes
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Science & Technology
Elon Musk Announces Plan to Populate Mars, Says “It’s Time to Get Biblically Fruitful”
BOCA CHICA, TX — In a press conference held entirely in Latin and streamed at 2:37 AM via X (formerly Twitter), Elon Musk unveiled…
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Science & Technology
Elon Musk Announces Controversial ‘Mandatory Fucking’ Policy for X Users
SAN FRANCISCO, CA—Billionaire Elon Musk announced today that users of X (formerly Twitter) will soon be required to engage in mandatory fucking at least…
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Science & Technology
Elon Musk Buys Twitter’s Debt with Pocket Change and Pays People to Tweet – Because Why Not?
Elon Musk Buys Twitter’s Debt with Pocket Change and Pays People to Tweet – Because Why Not? Hold onto your tweeting thumbs. In a…
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Politics
Trump’s Back on X! From Jailbird to Tweetmaster, the Orange Tornado Returns to Grift & Guffaw – Get Your Wallets Ready!
Well, butter my biscuits, it’s happened! The one and only Donald Trump, the man whose hair could have its own Twitter account, has made…
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Science & Technology
Elon Musk Rips Up the Rulebook: Twitter ‘X’ to Implement Digital Communism!
San Francisco, CA – In what can only be described as Silicon Valley’s boldest crossover episode, Elon Musk has announced his latest venture: a…
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Science & Technology
LinkedIn Unveils Chirpy: It’s Twitter-like Microblogging App
Fresh on the heels of Meta’s latest leap into the Twitter-bloodbath with its Threads app, LinkedIn, the networking platform that pleases exactly no one,…
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Politics
DeSantis Announces Presidency Amidst Sound of Crashing Servers, North Korea Sends Congrats
SAN FRANCISCO – North Korea congratulates Florida Governor Ron DeSantis on his successful 2024 presidential campaign launch. The announcement, delivered via a Twitter Space…
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Entertainment
SuperCum Trend Takes Over Twitter: Gen Z’s Earth-Shattering TikTok Craze Leaves Boomers Begging for Apocalyptic Asteroids
n the vast expanse of the internet, there resides a realm called TikTok where rebellious Gen Z-ers, armed with nothing but smartphones and questionable…
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Science & Technology
Horny Twitter Users Rejoice: Elon Musk Announces New Checkmark
Twitter seems to be taking the “thirst” game to the next level. Tossy tech billionaire Elon Musk announced that Twitter would be adding a…
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Science & Technology
George Soros Swipes New York Times with a $7 Lifeline: Twitter Blue Checkmark Drama Unfolds!
Billionaire philanthropist George Soros has swooped in to save the floundering New York Times from the embarrassment of losing its coveted blue checkmark on…
