Tag
Tag: Donald Trump
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Politics
Huge Relief: Trump Preparing To Peacefully Leave Office In 2029 By Building A War-Capable Bunker Under The White House
The president is soothing concerns about the end of his second term with a drone-proof ballroom, a military hospital, secure infrastructure, and several floors…
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Politics
Trump Says Gas Prices Should Be Much Higher If Iran Even Thinking About Uranium
WASHINGTON – President Donald Trump said that Americans should prepare to pay “whatever the hell it takes” at the pump if there is even…
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Opinion
I Used To Think Barack Obama Was Disappointing. Then America Replaced Him With Donald Trump
WASHINGTON – I used to think Barack Obama was disappointing. I thought he compromised too much. I thought he talked too long. I thought…
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Politics
White House Denies Trump Used Two-Way Diaper During China Trade Talks
WASHINGTON—The White House has forcefully denied reports that President Donald Trump wore a “two-way diaper” during high-level China trade talks, calling the allegation “false,…
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Reviews
I Reviewed The Trump Phone For 72 Hours
NEW YORK CITY – After months of delays, revised promises, disappearing specifications, and a website that increasingly reads like a hostage note written by…
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Science & Technology
Taiwan Responds To Trump’s Maybe-We-Defend-You Routine By Casually Reminding America Who Makes Literally Everything
Taiwan answers Trump's defense waffling by politely letting America remember where the chips, phones, AI servers, and global panic all come from.
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Science & Technology
Nvidia CEO Jensen Huang Ate Noodles Through Trump’s China Trip Like Everyone Else Was A Loading Screen
The Nvidia CEO joined Trump's Beijing delegation and somehow turned semiconductor diplomacy into a noodle-shop power ranking.
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Music
Drake’s Three New Albums Are So Bad Trump Needs To Send Troops To Canada Immediately
After Drake dropped Iceman, Habibti, and Maid of Honour, several officials became convinced Canada had lost control of its most dangerous export.
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Politics
Strong Leadership: Trump Spent Xi’s Entire Taiwan Warning With His Eyes Closed To Better Visualize The Deal
Officials say the president was simply receiving Xi's Taiwan warning in a very interior way.
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Politics
Sweet Gesture: President Trump Gifted Xi Jinping A Pot Of Honey And Asked If China Was Finally Ready To Get Serious About Bees
President Donald Trump marked a diplomatic meeting with Xi Jinping by presenting a jar of American honey and several minutes of bee-adjacent confidence.
