Category: Culture

Culture

National Communication Crisis Deepens As Australians Continue Answering Questions By Describing What Is Not Happening

A new report finds Australians are still answering every question by carefully explaining what is not happening.

Culture

‘He Was Giving Kisses’: Woman Insists Blood-Soaked Mailman Is Being Dramatic About Her Sweet Little Pit Bull Angel

A woman insists her pit bull is a sweet little angel after a mail carrier, a neighboring dog, and several statistics become the real…

Life & Style

Chanel Launches Pay In 4, A New Fragrance For Women Who Want To Smell Expensive During A Klarna Dispute

The new scent reportedly blends bergamot, white musk, smoked vanilla, and one base note listed only as pending approval.

Entertainment

Still Here: David Hasselhoff Announced His Comeback To A Room That Was Not Aware He Had Left

The Hoff promised a triumphant return, forcing several entertainment reporters to determine whether he had technically been absent or simply ambient for decades.

Entertainment

Heroic: Celebrity Worth $180 Million Sticks It To The Man By Condemning The Bad Thing

A beloved millionaire has finally challenged power by announcing that the bad thing everyone already hated is, in fact, bad.

Life & Style

Retail Misunderstanding: Tiger Woods Detained At Costco After Trying To Leave With Kirkland Popcorn Tucked Into His Aura

Employees say the golfer treated a Costco receipt like a suggestion and briefly entered a private dispute with popcorn, cashews, and a kayak.

Music

Sick Little Fuck: Pusha T Was Apparently Ready For The Diddy Do It Tour Before Someone Read The Island Name Out Loud

A cursed tour-poster mockup reportedly placed Pusha T, Diddy, Jay-Z, French Montana, and Rick Ross on one private island bill no publicist could survive.

Science & Technology

Former White Castle Employees Say Elon Musk Spent The Mid-’90s Carrying A Bucket Of ‘White Sauce’ And Calling It Humanity’s Backup Plan

Former White Castle coworkers allegedly remember the billionaire as an overnight-shift sauce visionary with a bucket, a population chart, and no respect for refrigeration.

Music

Civic Duty: Chappell Roan Fans Mistook A Routine City Council Meeting For A Secret Album Rollout

Officials say the public-comment period was never intended to function as an encrypted pop announcement, despite several persuasive hats in attendance.

Entertainment

Heroic: Laura Clery’s Refrigerator Has Become The First Household Appliance To Understand The Content Economy

Laura Clery's refrigerator has reportedly discovered that nearly killing its owner is an extremely efficient way to enter the creator economy.