Patriotic: Trump Announces NBA Finals Booing Will Be Added To National Anthem As Percussion
The White House said the crowd noise proved Americans were finally ready for an anthem arrangement with more honesty in the lower register.
After being booed during the National Anthem at Game 3 of the NBA Finals, President Donald Trump has announced that the crowd noise will be formally added to the song as a new patriotic percussion layer.
The update, which White House aides are calling the “Madison Square Garden arrangement,” will preserve the anthem’s traditional melody while adding a low, sustained civic groan whenever the camera finds a president who has insisted on becoming part of the pregame ceremony.
“The president heard thousands of Americans expressing themselves in one unified tone, and frankly that is what the anthem is all about,” said deputy cultural readiness adviser Clayton Reever, standing beside a military band member holding a snare drum and a small microphone labeled only with a frown. “Some countries use cymbals. Some use cannons. We have chosen to honor the sound of a crowd realizing this is going to be on every group chat before halftime.”
Under the new arrangement, the lyric “O say does that star-spangled banner yet wave” will be followed by four measures of arena disapproval, one confused cheer from a man who did not look up in time, and a courtside audio engineer whispering that he cannot take the president out of the mix because the president is now the mix.
Trump praised the change as one of the strongest anthems ever recorded, noting that most presidents receive silence during ceremonial appearances while he had inspired “very loud, very powerful participation from a lot of people who knew exactly who was on the screen.”
At press time, the White House was also reviewing footage from the second quarter to determine whether a Knicks fan yelling “sit down” could be classified as a new branch of the Armed Forces.
