Author
Author: Martin Finch
Martin Finch covers general assignment stories for VanFLIP, from civic theater and brand misfires to the little rituals public figures use when they are trying not to apologize. He has a soft spot for cats, a firm belief that most meetings should have been a sandwich, and an enduring loyalty to steak cooked simply, preferably by someone who does not describe it as a concept.
General assignment, civic theater, and cultural oddities
Martin Finch covers general assignment stories for VanFLIP, from civic theater and brand misfires to the little rituals public figures use when they are trying not to apologize. He has a soft spot for cats, a firm belief that most meetings should have been a sandwich, and an enduring loyalty to steak cooked simply, preferably by someone who does not describe it as a concept.
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Music
Taylor Swift Shakes Off Sanity: Announces ‘Outside Stadium’ Concert Experience!
LOS ANGELES, CA – Just when we thought we had figured out the ‘Swiftian’ universe, Taylor Swift, the pop music sensation and occasional cat…
· By Martin Finch
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Life & Style
Haagen-Dazs Drops a Bombshell: No More Cow Semen in Their Ice Cream – Will It Ever Taste the Same?
Haagen-Dazs has announced its decision to remove cow semen from its ice cream recipe. The company has cited “health concerns” and “changing consumer preferences”…
· By Martin Finch
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Entertainment
Ricky Gervais Devours Bus Stop Gum Like a Fucking Legend, Proves Humanity Isn’t All Bad
In a world where most celebrities are as fake as the CGI in the latest Marvel movie, one man – Ricky Gervais – decided…
· By Martin Finch
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Music
Taylor Swift to Debut “Cntrl, Alt, Vax” Tour in Your City, Ready to Tickle Your Humerus with COVID-19 Vaccine
In the race against COVID-19, everyone needs a shake-up to the monotonous drag of daily life. So, grab your cowboy boots and kitten calendars…
· By Martin Finch
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Science & Technology
“Vaccines Now 200% Effective!” Declares Esteemed Immunologist Amidst Medical Tumult
Respected immunologist Dr Benjamin Credence, a leading authority at Johns Hopkins School of Medicine and known for his unconventional theories, sent shockwaves through a…
· By Martin Finch
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Entertainment
Lorde of the Rings No More: New Zealand Revokes Lorde’s Citizenship After Singer’s Cinematic Blasphemy
New Zealand has stripped singer Lorde of her citizenship after she publicly declared that the Lord of the Rings movies are “absolute rubbish.” In…
· By Martin Finch
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Life & Style
Keanu Reeves Revs Up Appetites with Fiery Motorcycle Entrance at Swanky Italian Eatery
Rome, Italy – Hollywood heartthrob Keanu Reeves shocked patrons at the upscale Italian restaurant, “Il Veloce e il Gustoso,” by making a grand entrance…
· By Martin Finch
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Life & Style
Wendy’s Boldly Dares IRS to ‘Make Them’ Pay Taxes: A Fast Food Revolution in the Works?
CHICAGO, IL – It’s a good old-fashioned game of chicken, with a side of fries, as Wendy’s, the beloved fast food chain, has issued…
· By Martin Finch
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Music
Butch Vig Spills the Beans: Nirvana’s Secret Obsession with Celine Dion Finally Exposed
Los Angeles, CA – Hold on to your ripped jeans and flannel, folks, because renowned music producer Butch Vig just dropped a grunge-busting bombshell…
· By Martin Finch
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Politics
Operation ‘I Can’t Quit the Drone Life’: Former President Barack Obama Literally Hits the Ground Running, Trading in Golf Clubs for Bomber Drone Joysticks
If you thought former President Barack Obama had all his bases covered after leaving the White House, think again! Just when you thought those…
· By Martin Finch