Author
Author: Martin Finch
Martin Finch covers general assignment stories for VanFLIP, from civic theater and brand misfires to the little rituals public figures use when they are trying not to apologize. He has a soft spot for cats, a firm belief that most meetings should have been a sandwich, and an enduring loyalty to steak cooked simply, preferably by someone who does not describe it as a concept.
General assignment, civic theater, and cultural oddities
Martin Finch covers general assignment stories for VanFLIP, from civic theater and brand misfires to the little rituals public figures use when they are trying not to apologize. He has a soft spot for cats, a firm belief that most meetings should have been a sandwich, and an enduring loyalty to steak cooked simply, preferably by someone who does not describe it as a concept.
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Music
Satisfying His Twisted Desires: How Marilyn Manson Seduced Himself
Notorious musician Marilyn Manson has come forward with a startling revelation about his anatomy. During a recent interview, the self-proclaimed “Antichrist Superstar” confirmed long-standing…
· By Martin Finch
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Life & Style
KFC’s Secret Recipe: Are KFC Behind The Mysterious Death of Jeffrey Epstein?
It has been alleged that KFC, the fast-food chain known for its delicious fried chicken, may have orchestrated the death of wealthy pedophile Jeffrey…
· By Martin Finch
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Life & Style
Local Man Hears Voices, Decides to Take Out His Rage on a Warehouse Full of Paper Towels
A local man, known only as Tim, has decided to take matters into his own hands by burning down a warehouse full of paper…
· By Martin Finch
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Music
Selena Gomez’s Mental Health in Question as She Rants About Israel and Palestine
Pop sensation Selena Gomez has caused uproar after she allegedly shouted “Free Palestine” during a live concert and announced her intentions to head to…
· By Martin Finch
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Entertainment
From Laughs to Punches: My Night of Madness with Comedian Bert Kreischer
Last night, I found myself in the midst of a chaotic and intoxicated adventure with none other than comedian Bert Kreischer. I was there,…
· By Martin Finch
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Opinion
My Unbelievable Encounter with America’s Most Controversial Prostate ‘Doctor’: A Dark Alley Healthcare Revolution?
In the shadowy corners of America’s healthcare debate, where the discussion often oscillates between the exorbitant cost of insurance and the inaccessibility of timely…
· By Martin Finch
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Science & Technology
Government Officials Now Probing Cryptocurrency Investors’ Buttholes!
In a bold move to reel in those who have profited from the recent surge in cryptocurrency prices, the IRS has announced a new…
· By Martin Finch
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Music
Local Man Discovers Shocking Reason Behind Daily Potato Deliveries: Limp Bizkit’s Wes Borland is Behind It All!
Local man Joe McGinty has uncovered the unsettling truth behind the mysterious potato deliveries he’s been receiving at his doorstep every morning. According to…
· By Martin Finch
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Music
Periphery’s Frontman Spencer Sotelo Loses His Mind and Gets Political at Concert
The progressive metal band Periphery has gone full MAGA, with frontman Spencer Sotelo ranting about “the wall” and illegals voting in the 2024 election…
· By Martin Finch
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Music
Tom DeLonge’s Legs in Danger as Loan Sharks Close In On The Blink 182 Frontman
Tom DeLonge, the frontman of Blink 182, is in some seriously deep water. According to our sources, DeLonge owes a massive pile of money…
· By Martin Finch