GTA 6 Is Coming, And Wives Are Being Urged To Say Goodbye Now
Your husband says he'll only play for an hour. It would help to establish which one.
Wives hoping to speak to their husbands before the end of the year are being advised to cover the important stuff now, as men across the country begin preparing to become a warm shape on the sofa when GTA 6 arrives.
Grand Theft Auto VI launches November 19 on PlayStation 5 and Xbox Series X|S. Household preparations are already underway, with husbands buying snacks, checking controllers, and asking whether the family has anything planned for the next several weeks that could be described as optional.
“He asked me what time Christmas starts,” said married dental receptionist Nicole Bell, whose husband has taken leave from work to get through the opening section properly. “I told him it was more of an all-day thing. He looked absolutely fucked.”
The preparations have given families a brief opportunity to transfer essential knowledge. Darren Bell has been shown how to restart the washing machine after it displays an error. He wrote the instructions on his phone, then asked Nicole whether the error happened often enough to worry about. Nicole said it had happened twice that day. Darren said the machine sounded as though it needed a patch.
Partners should use the remaining days to establish where the spare key lives and which relatives are still married. A brief conversation about the washing machine can also help, although husbands have warned that retaining new information could interfere with remembering the controls.
Nicole has drawn up a household handover list covering bills, groceries, and the difference between the bin day and the day the bins need to go out. Darren says he knows all of this already. When asked which day the bins go out, he said he didn’t want the conversation to turn into a test.
“I’m trying to be supportive,” Nicole said. “I asked if he wanted a few days where I handled everything. He said he’d really appreciate that. Then he asked whether the few days could start now, because there was a lot to prepare.”
Several men have promised they will only play for an hour. Their wives have been encouraged to ask which hour, because none has yet provided a date.
Elsewhere, partners are being advised to complete any conversation requiring more than a nod before the game is available. A nod can be obtained during play, but it should not be treated as proof that the information has reached the person. One wife discovered that her husband had agreed to replace the kitchen while trying to reverse a car. He is contesting the decision on the grounds that she should have seen what was happening.
Bell’s husband, Darren, has prepared a shopping list containing 18 items, all of which can be opened with one hand. He has also purchased a second controller in case the first develops a fault during a moment when returning to his marriage would be inconvenient.
The leave arrangements have produced their own strain. Darren told his manager he needed time for a personal commitment. The manager asked whether everything was all right at home. Darren said it would be if he could have the days. Nicole has asked him to stop letting people imagine she’s the reason he needs privacy.
“I’ll still be here,” Darren said. “You can talk to me whenever you want. Just maybe wait until I’m not doing something.”
His snack plan has been tested against several conditions. Food must fit beside the controller, leave limited residue, and be possible to eat without learning where a plate is. Nicole suggested making sandwiches in advance. Darren said he didn’t want to create extra work for her, then asked whether she could choose fillings that wouldn’t fall out during an important bit.
Nicole has asked him to identify a moment in a Grand Theft Auto game when he considers himself to be doing nothing. He says he doesn’t want to get into technical stuff before dinner.
Relationship counselor Mara Fenn has recommended that couples agree on a stopping phrase with a clear meaning. Just a minute is unsuitable because it can cover a loading screen, a mission, or the remaining usable portion of a spouse’s evening. Fenn suggests stating a clock time and asking the player to repeat it. Several husbands have requested a less confrontational approach.
Wives are also advised to take a current photograph while their husbands are still making eye contact. There is no need to report anyone missing. They will be in the living room, loudly asking a fictional man why the fuck he parked there.
Nicole has scheduled a dinner with friends shortly after release. Darren says he’ll come if he reaches a good place to stop. She has asked whether that means somewhere in the story or somewhere in their relationship. He says she knows what he means. She says she’d feel better if he could say it while looking away from the television.
