Archive
Year: 2025
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Entertainment
Ben Stiller Under Fire for Alleged Unauthorized “Severance” Experiments on Volunteers
Los Angeles, CA – Ben Stiller, the man who brought us slapstick classics like Zoolander and the mind-bending Apple TV+ series Severance, has reportedly…
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Life & Style
Dad Crushed After Son’s “Piracy” Turns Out to Be Just Illegal Downloads
FORT WAYNE, IN – Local father Greg Hensley was reportedly “gutted” this week after discovering that his 16-year-old son Tyler’s newfound interest in “piracy”…
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Entertainment
Keanu Reeves Caught Red-Handed Hawking Miracle Anti-Aging Cream at Local Flea Market
Los Angeles, CA – Hollywood icon Keanu Reeves, known for his timeless looks and brooding action roles, was spotted this weekend peddling jars of…
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Opinion
OPINION: America Needs More Guns
America’s problem isn’t too many guns. It’s not enough guns. The solution to our national woes; crime, political gridlock, even the occasional bear sighting…
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Music
Architects’ The Sky, The Earth & All Between Album Review: A Christian Mom Warns of Satan’s Latest Hit Record
I’ve been a Christian mom for 16 years, and I thought I’d seen it all. Pokémon cards with witchcraft vibes, that Harry Potter nonsense,…
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Life & Style
KFC Seizes Texas in Greasy Coup, Declares State a “Chickenocracy”
PLANO, TX – Texans traded their ten-gallon hats for gravy-stained bucket lids today after Kentucky Fried Chicken executed a hostile takeover of the state…
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Life & Style
Yale University’s Big Segregation Comeback: “America’s Back, and We’ve Got the Dorms to Prove It!”
New Haven, CT – Yale University, the Ivy League’s self-proclaimed arbiter of moral superiority, has decided to dust off an old American playbook and…
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Entertainment
Timothée Chalamet Exposed: Hollywood’s Golden Boy Has a Dark Side
Los Angeles, CA – Timothée Chalamet, the floppy-haired darling of indie cinema and heartthrob to millions, might not be the saintly artist his PR…
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Entertainment
Lynne Marie Stewart Found Dead at 78: Was Alec Baldwin’s Latest “Accident” a Cover-Up for Hollywood’s Darkest Secret?
Los Angeles, CA – February 24, 2025 – Lynne Marie Stewart, the actress who brought chain-smoking Bonnie Kelly to life on It’s Always Sunny…
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Life & Style
Pope Francis Orders Vatican to “Party Like It’s 999” as He Nears the End
ROME – With Pope Francis clinging to life in Gemelli Hospital, the Vatican dropped a bombshell Monday afternoon that has Catholics worldwide clutching their…
