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Entertainment
Jake Paul Asks Girlfriend’s Boyfriend to Open Jar, Another Crushing Defeat for YouTuber Turned Boxer
In yet another sign of his decline, YouTuber turned boxer Jake Paul was caught on camera asking his girlfriend’s boyfriend to open a jar…
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Entertainment
Mr Beast Takes Capitalism to the Next Level with Request for Free Labor
Popular YouTube star and philanthropist Mr Beast has done it again, folks. He’s found a new and innovative way to push the limits of…
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Opinion
I Can’t Wait for the Day When All the Ice Caps Melt and I Can Enjoy My Ocean Views!
As a boomer, I’ve spent my fair share of time on this planet, and I have to say, I’m getting a little tired of…
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Music
Metal Band Sees The Error Of Their Ways After Taking Down Tabs From Ultimate Guitar
The metal band, Megalithic Destruction recently made a huge mistake when they asked Ultimate Guitar to take down guitar tabs for their older songs.…
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Life & Style
Starbucks Customers Rejoice as Frog in Coffee Machine Boosts Flavor
In what constitutes many violations of the local health code, a frog somehow found its way into a Starbucks coffee machine and got trapped.…
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Music
The National’s New Song ‘Tropic Morning News’ So Boring, It Puts Listeners to Sleep!
Indie rock band The National has just released a new song from their upcoming album, First Two Pages of Frankenstein. Titled “Tropic Morning News,”…
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Life & Style
Andrew Tate Let’s Us Down Again, Fails to Develop Lung Cancer
Fans of Andrew Tate were left disappointed yet again this week, as the controversial figure announced that he does not have lung cancer. Tate,…
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Science & Technology
Twitter Blue Users Under Attack as Broke and Lonely Unverified Twitter Users Turn to Jealousy and Spite
It’s a classic case of the haves versus the have-nots: as more and more Twitter users struggle to make ends meet, they’re turning their…
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Politics
Donald Trump Caught Scrounging for Change, Faces Bankruptcy for 12th Time: Is This the End of His Golden Toilet Dreams?
It’s a scene straight out of a tragicomedy: the former President of the United States, billionaire businessman, and self-proclaimed “stable genius” is caught rummaging…
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Music
Aussie Metalcore Band Patient Sixty-Seven Partners with Bunnings to Give Fans Snags at Upcoming Shows
Australian metalcore band Patient Sixty-Seven is teaming up with hardware store giant Bunnings to give fans a delicious treat at their upcoming shows: snags.…