Life & Style

Starbucks Customers Rejoice as Frog in Coffee Machine Boosts Flavor

In what constitutes many violations of the local health code, a frog somehow found its way into a Starbucks coffee machine and got trapped.…

Music

The National’s New Song ‘Tropic Morning News’ So Boring, It Puts Listeners to Sleep!

Indie rock band The National has just released a new song from their upcoming album, First Two Pages of Frankenstein. Titled “Tropic Morning News,”…

Life & Style

Andrew Tate Let’s Us Down Again, Fails to Develop Lung Cancer

Fans of Andrew Tate were left disappointed yet again this week, as the controversial figure announced that he does not have lung cancer. Tate,…

Science & Technology

Twitter Blue Users Under Attack as Broke and Lonely Unverified Twitter Users Turn to Jealousy and Spite

It’s a classic case of the haves versus the have-nots: as more and more Twitter users struggle to make ends meet, they’re turning their…

Politics

Donald Trump Caught Scrounging for Change, Faces Bankruptcy for 12th Time: Is This the End of His Golden Toilet Dreams?

It’s a scene straight out of a tragicomedy: the former President of the United States, billionaire businessman, and self-proclaimed “stable genius” is caught rummaging…

Music

Aussie Metalcore Band Patient Sixty-Seven Partners with Bunnings to Give Fans Snags at Upcoming Shows

Australian metalcore band Patient Sixty-Seven is teaming up with hardware store giant Bunnings to give fans a delicious treat at their upcoming shows: snags.…

Music

Subway Releases Statement: Hacktivist Vocalist’s Rap Was ‘Too Hot to Handle’

In a shocking turn of events, the vocalist of British Limp Bizkit, Hacktivist, was caught on camera rapping his order to the sandwich artist…

Opinion

Tim Henson: Ellen DeGeneres of the Guitar World

Known for his eclectic style and mesmerizing riffs, Tim Henson has become the Ellen DeGeneres of the guitar. His captivating solos and intricate rhythms…

Music

Frank Ocean Drops New Album, Leaves Fans Guessing

Frank Ocean fans were left scratching their heads this past week when the multi-Grammy Award-winning artist announced the release of his highly anticipated new…

Opinion

Two Rocks, One Hard Choice: Who Will Be Dinner on the Island: Misha Mansoor or Winston McCall?

We’ve all faced a dilemma at some point in our lives: stuck on an island with Misha Mansoor of Periphery and Winston McCall of…