Science & Technology Archives - Page 3 of 6

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Fresh on the heels of Meta's latest leap into the Twitter-bloodbath with its Threads app, LinkedIn, the networking platform that pleases exactly no one, has unveiled its revolutionary (and not…

25

Jun 2023

Science & Technology

Mark Zuckerberg Denies Being a Robot, Raises Suspicion of Being a Robot

In a highly suspicious move, Facebook CEO Mark Zuckerberg recently announced that he is not, in fact, a robot. The statement came during a press conference where Zuckerberg attempted to…

18

Jun 2023

Science & Technology

Elon Musk and Joe Rogan Debate Over Who Can Blow The Most Smoke… Out of a Rocket

In an utterly shocking episode of the Joe Rogan Experience, the pixie-haired tech wizard, Elon Musk, hopscotched on to the stage to challenge the fearless follicly-endowed ex-MMA, now multi-hyphenate, Joe…

10

Jun 2023

Science & Technology

Mark Zuckerberg Requests Updates to His Software to Be Able to Express New Emotions to be More Relatable to Facebook Users

Mark Zuckerberg, the CEO of Facebook, has requested updates to his software that will allow him to express new emotions to better connect with users. The move comes after criticism…

25

May 2023

Science & Technology

Neural DSP Declares End to Capitalism with Archetype: Tom Morello

HELSINKI, FINLAND — In a ballsy move that would make Karl Marx break into an air guitar solo, Neural DSP has just announced the launch of Archetype: Tom Morello. This…

22

May 2023

Science & Technology

Elon Musk’s death beam satellite: a game-changer or a recipe for disaster?

In an announcement that surprised no one, Elon Musk revealed that his latest invention, a death beam satellite, is almost complete. But fear not. The billionaire inventor and Twitter CEO…

24

Apr 2023

Science & Technology

Horny Twitter Users Rejoice: Elon Musk Announces New Checkmark

Twitter seems to be taking the “thirst” game to the next level. Tossy tech billionaire Elon Musk announced that Twitter would be adding a new checkmark to signal when a…

19

Apr 2023

Science & Technology

Child Prodigy’s New Power Source Threatens Tesla Empire: Elon Musk Sends Henchmen to Sabotage

The world of renewable energy is about to be turned upside down, and Elon Musk is shaking in his space boots. In a quaint suburban garage, a 12-year-old child prodigy…

12

Apr 2023

Science & Technology

Neil Armstrong’s True Legacy: The Man He Left on the Moon for Some Space Rocks

You may have heard the famous saying, "one small step for man, one giant leap for mankind" – well, we bet you haven't heard about the OTHER small step, the…

09

Apr 2023

Science & Technology

Epic Fail! Bill Gates Accidentally Releases Vaccine for Next Pandemic Virus That He Hasn’t Released Yet

Seattle, WA: Microsoft mogul and technology soothsayer Bill Gates has done it again – and this time, it's a doozy. In an epic display of human fallibility, Gates has unwittingly…