Music Archives - Page 3 of 34

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Sleep Token, the mysterious electronic band known for their haunting melodies and impenetrable hoods, has announced the upcoming release of their highly anticipated third studio album. The new record, titled…

27

Feb 2024

Music

Laugh Out Loud as Drake Backs Down from a fight in an Alleyway Showdown!

Rapper and supposed street thug Drake has been revealed as nothing more than a soft-hearted marshmallow! A bold fan dared to challenge the so-called "6 God" to a no-holds-barred brawl,…

26

Feb 2024

Music

Liam Gallagher Shockingly Discovered to Be a Talentless, Hacky, Piece of Shit Who Can’t Sing, Write Songs, or Make a Decent Pint of Tea

Former Oasis frontman Liam Gallagher has been outed as a complete and utter fraud, revealing himself to be nothing more than a talentless, hacky piece of shit who can't sing,…

26

Feb 2024

Music

Breaking News: Miraculous Ceiling Collapse Saves Thousands From Trapt Concert

Filed under divine intervention. The ceiling of the popular Trapt concert venue, Bucky's Shitbox Saloon, collapsed mid-show in Boise, Idaho, saving thousands of unsuspecting attendees from subjecting themselves to the…

26

Feb 2024

Music

Tom Kiely From Patient-Sixty-Seven Threatens to Take Out Competition with Violent Methods

Tom Kiely, the lead singer of Australian metalcore band Patient-Sixty-Seven, has threatened to have several rival bands "whacked" in a fit of uncontrolled rage. This news has sent shockwaves through…

25

Feb 2024

Music

I HAD DINNER AT ROB HALFORD’S HOUSE AND I WISHED I HAD BROUGHT EARPLUGS

I had the once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to have dinner at the home of Judas Priest's legendary frontman, Rob Halford. As a casual listener of his music, I was excited to share…

25

Feb 2024

Music

Slayer’s Reunion: As Tasty as Moldy Bread

Legendary thrash metal band, Slayer, has announced their highly anticipated reunion, shaking the music world to its core. But don't get too excited, because after digging through their discography, it's…

25

Feb 2024

Music

Breaking News: Tosin Abasi Unveils His Secret Sauce to Musical Success – You Won’t Believe What He Says Next!

NEW YORK, NY - Tosin Abasi, the enigmatic and suave motherfucker from the progressive metal band Animals As Leaders, has finally revealed his secret to achieving musical success. For years,…

24

Feb 2024

Music

EXCLUSIVE: Misha Mansoor Caught in Scandalous Orgy with Periphery Fans

Renowned progressive metal guitarist Misha Mansoor, better known by his stage name "Bulb," was caught red-handed in a scandalous orgy with a group of devoted Periphery fans, leading to the…

24

Feb 2024

Music

Ronnie Radke: The Peeing Messiah of Modern Music

Falling In Reverse's enigmatic frontman, Ronnie Radke, has recently been caught in a controversy following a series of inexplicable public urination incidents. As expected, Radke's devoted fans rally behind their…