Science &amp; Technology

Nuclear Sushi, Anyone? Japan’s Newest Water Feature From the Heart of Fukushima

Hold onto your chopsticks because Japan is about to make the biggest splash in the Pacific since Godzilla took a bath! That's right, people, the Land of the Rising Sun…

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Elon Musk Rips Up the Rulebook: Twitter ‘X’ to Implement Digital Communism!

San Francisco, CA - In what can only be described as Silicon Valley's boldest crossover episode, Elon Musk has announced his latest venture: a foray into the wild, untamed world…

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Apple Announces iAir

Cupertino, California - In a staggering, reality-bending announcement that has left consumers gasping for, well, air, Apple CEO Tim Cook revealed the company's latest offering - the iAir. Yes, you…

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JavaScript’s Billionth Baby: Welcome to the World, New Framework!

SAN FRANCISCO, CA - Set your faces to stunned, because the tech heavens have opened up and blessed us with another JavaScript framework. In an event that rivals the second…

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“Vaccines Now 200% Effective!” Declares Esteemed Immunologist Amidst Medical Tumult

Respected immunologist Dr Benjamin Credence, a leading authority at Johns Hopkins School of Medicine and known for his unconventional theories, sent shockwaves through a recent medical conference by announcing a…

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Harvard’s Groundbreaking Revelation: Rust Programmers Claim Superior IQs but Grapple with “Shrimpy Schlong Syndrome”

In the hallowed halls of Harvard University, where knowledge pours from every corner like a perpetual coffee machine, an unprecedented study has rocketed out of the academic stratosphere. This study…

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Former Crypto Bro Turned AI Bro Announces He Is Pivoting Back To Crypto

Just when you thought the yo-yo antics of tech moguls couldn't get any more nausea-inducing, here comes our favorite silicon valley chameleon, Brad Barkley, to prove us all wrong. You…

11

Developer Insists ‘It Worked On My Machine’ as Code Crashes in Spectacular Fashion

Tampa Bay, FL - In a textbook demonstration of utter denial, local software engineer Mike McGonagall insisted with a straight face that his supposedly bug-free code was "working just fine"…

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