Corey Taylor, the Slipknot frontman known for his insightful commentary on everything from the existential dread of existence to the correct method of eating spaghetti, has finally offered his much-anticipated opinion on the shape of the Earth. "It's complicated, but also, not really," Taylor elucidated, sparking a global debate that has, quite literally, changed absolutely…

After years of confusion and misunderstandings, Slipknot, the Grammy-award-winning heavy metal band, has finally come clean about their true identity. In a shocking press conference held yesterday, lead vocalist Corey Taylor announced that Slipknot is not, in fact, a band about tying knots. "We've been living a lie for far too long," Taylor said. "It's…

Slipknot and Stone Sour frontman Corey Taylor has weighed in on the never-ending debate of the world's problems, and it turns out the solution was simpler than we all thought. "I just don't give a shit," Taylor stated nonchalantly in an interview with Vanflip. "It's that simple. If we all just stopped caring about the…