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Politics

BREAKING: Puppet Masters Caught Red-Handed as Joe Biden’s Speech Reveals Obvious String Attachments!

WASHINGTON, D.C. – The mystery surrounding President Joe Biden's seemingly unnatural movements and speeches has finally been answered! During a particularly heated political discourse, eagle-eyed spectators noticed the curious sight of strings attached to Biden's limbs, effectively converting the distinguished President into a life-sized marionette. Puppetgate has swiftly gripped the nation, raising perplexing questions about…
15 July 20230Comments

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Politics

Australian PM Albanese’s ‘Inflation Comedy’ Bombs Harder than the Housing Market Crash of ’08

Australian Prime Minister Anthony Albanese, better known in the satirical circuit as "Albo the Comic Kango," decided Saturday Night Live was a bit mainstream. He took his raucous talents to the mundane yet cherished institution - Parliament House. His target? The painfully unfunny topic of inflation. "Now, look, there's this joke I've been working on,"…
26 June 20230Comments

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Music

Brace Yourselves, Snowflakes: Born of Osiris Just Announced a MAGA-Inspired Metal Album That’s Guaranteed to Melt Your Safe Space

In the cacophonic world of metal, witness the unparalleled fusion of political soundbites and breakdowns that will leave you questioning reality. Born of Osiris has turned the tables on political correctness and embarked on a colossal journey into uncharted territory – a full-blown MAGA-inspired concept album. Say goodbye to your avocado toast and put down…
6 April 20230Comments

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Politics

#TrumpsLaptop Takes Twitter by Storm as Secret Documents Surface, But the Real Horror Show is Windows 98 and Icon-Infested Desktop

TrumpsLaptop has been making headlines on Twitter after top-secret documents were discovered on the former leader of the free world's personal laptop. But the real shocker? The man was still using Windows 98 as his operating system. Yes, you read that right. The man who once led the country was using a computer system that…
12 February 20230Comments

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Politics

Trump Rent-Free Tenancy in American Public’s Minds Hits All-Time High, Psychologist Reports

In a recent survey conducted by prominent psychologist and landlord, Dr. Charles Mindspace, it has been confirmed that former President Donald Trump continues to reside rent-free inside the heads of both his voters and enemies alike. According to Dr. Mindspace, "Mr. Trump has successfully established a permanent residency in the minds of millions of people,…
6 February 20230Comments

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Politics

Democrats and Republicans, Shut Up and Pay Your Taxes Like Good Little Worker Bees: Your Money Will Help Fund the War Machine, Because Who Hates the Troops?

It's time to put aside our political differences and come together as a nation to do what we do best: pay taxes. That's right, folks! Whether you're a die-hard Democrat or a passionate Republican, there's one thing we can all agree on: taxes are a necessary evil. But why settle for just "necessary"? Taxes are…
1 February 20230Comments

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Politics

President Biden Found in Hot Water Once Again as Classified Documents Discovered at Local Jimmy John’s

Washington, D.C. - In yet another embarrassing blunder for the Biden Administration, a box of classified documents from the President's tenure as Vice President was discovered at a local Jimmy John's sandwich shop. Sources close to the situation report that the documents, which include sensitive information on national security and foreign relations, were found by…
29 January 20230Comments

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