Entertainment

Ashton Kutcher’s “Role Model” Danny Masterson Gets 30 Years Behind Bars

Oh boy, remember when Ashton Kutcher looked up to Danny Masterson? You know, the good ol' days when they starred together on That '70s Show, and Ashton thought Danny was…

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Mr. Least Unveils His ‘Bye Local’ Campaign: Buys Small Businesses Just to Bulldoze Them—Says It’s for the ‘Greater Bad’!

Ah, small businesses, the backbone of America. The quaint little shops where dreams are packaged into home-baked goods and hand-knit scarves. Enter Mr. Least—the twisted, moustache-twirling evil twin of Mr.…

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Missed the Boat on Taylor Swift’s ‘Era’s’ Tour Tickets? Join the Sobbing Fan Club of Losers!

It's a dark day in Swiftyville. Taylor Swift's 'Era's' tour tickets sold out faster than you can say "Shake it Off," you're one of the unfortunate souls who didn't snag…

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Jake Paul’s Sperm Loses the Battle to His Left Hook: Joe Rogan Reveals the Shocking Tale of Virility and Vanity

In the world of celebrity brawls, there's nothing quite as astounding as Jake Paul's left hook, except perhaps his sperm's performance—or lack thereof. That's right, fight fans; in a recent…

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He’s Back, Baby! Justin Timberlake’s Miraculous Resurrection From the Cross Proves He Can’t Stop the Feeling… Or Death!

Hold on to your hats, people. Our boy Justin Timberlake has just taken history's most jaw-dropping comeback tour. Forget about the charts, the stages, and the Grammys. JT's been nailed…

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Royal Leak! Prince Harry Now Wipes After He Pees, and the Internet Wants Meghan Arrested for ‘Toilet Tampering’

Ah, the British Royal Family! A symbol of dignity, grace, and—wait for it—proper pee etiquette? You read that right, folks. Rumors are swirling faster than a toilet flush that Prince…

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Bob Barker’s Heavenly Debut: God Declares “The Price is Eternity!” And Bob’s Still Not Sold

Bob Barker, the legend himself, who made spinning a gigantic wheel seem like a rational life choice, has finally stepped off the earthly stage. Guess where he ended up? That's…

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Michael Cera Discovers Hidden Treasure in His Couch – You Won’t Believe How Much He Found!

In a discovery that would make even Indiana Jones put down his whip and hang up his hat, Michael Cera, the man, myth, and legend, unearthed a cache of loose…

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