A Review of Harry Potter Hogwarts Legacy on PS5 by San Quentin Prison Inmates

The wizards of San Quentin prison were asked to review the new Harry Potter Hogwarts Legacy game on PS5 coming February 10th, 2023, and the results were... explosive. The review session, hosted by the San Quentin Warden, started out peacefully enough. Inmates were provided with a copy of the game and the latest Playstation 5…

ByAccomplished Author12 January 20230Comments

Music

Ville Valo Shocked as Bam Margera Transforms into Barista Monster

Finnish singer-songwriter Ville Valo was shocked to discover the transformation of his long-time friend, the American skateboarder and TV personality Bam Margera. In a recent interview, Valo expressed his disbelief when he discovered that his former close friend had taken a job as a barista at a coffee shop. “I can’t believe it. I mean,…

ByAccomplished Author11 January 20230Comments

Music

Does Frank Ocean Realize He Is Headlining Coachella 2023?

It's a perplexing question that many fans of Frank Ocean have been left asking after it was announced that the elusive singer-songwriter is set to headline the 2023 Coachella Music and Arts Festival. "Wait, what?" exclaimed an incredulous Ocean upon being told of his upcoming performance at the popular music festival. "I haven't even released…

ByAccomplished Author11 January 20230Comments

Music

Paramedics on Standby as Travis Scott is Announced as Headliner for Bonaroo 2024 In Accidental Leak

The Bonaroo 2023 line-up has only just been released, but in a huge oopsie daisy moment, the organizers accidentally revealed Travis Scott will be headlining Bonaroo in 2024. The announcement has been met with mixed reactions from fans, but for the most part, everyone agrees that Scott is an odd choice for a headlining act,…

ByAccomplished Author11 January 20230Comments

Music

Coachella Announces Knocked Loose As Part of 2023 Lineup, Crowd Asks “Who?”

It's no secret that Coachella is the go-to music festival for discovering the latest and greatest bands, but this year festival-goers may be scratching their heads when they hear one of the artists for 2023: Knocked Loose. The little-known hardcore punk band from Kentucky has been making waves in the underground music scene, but it…

ByAccomplished Author11 January 20230Comments

Music

Hipsters Celebrate as Neutral Milk Hotel Announces Vinyl Box Set Release

In a move that has sent hipsters across the world into a frenzy of excitement, beloved indie-rock band Neutral Milk Hotel has announced plans to release a special vinyl box set of their two album releases as well as some rarities. The news came as something of a surprise to fans, considering the group has…

ByAccomplished Author11 January 20230Comments

Music

Rod Stewart’s Birthday Cake: Blended For Easier Chewing

Today marks the 78th birthday of legendary singer Rod Stewart and in order to ensure he has the best day possible, his friends have prepared something special. Instead of a classic birthday cake, they've decided to blend it up to make it easier for Stewart's soft dentures to chew. The cake was constructed by mixing…

ByAccomplished Author11 January 20230Comments

Entertainment

Jared Leto’s Relaxing Shoulder Rubs Leave Us Suspicious

Jared Leto is known for taking his roles to the next level, and his latest venture is no different. The actor has been spotted around town giving out free shoulder rubs and telling his fans to relax while shushing them. The scene typically starts with Leto approaching a group of unsuspecting fans, asking, "Do you…

ByAccomplished Author11 January 20230Comments

Life & Style

Cardinal George Pell’s Last Tweet From Hell

Cardinal George Pell, the former Vatican treasurer, who has passed away at the age of 81 due to complications from hip surgery, took to Twitter one last time to share his feelings about his newly acquired location. In a posthumous tweet, he wrote, "It sure is hot in heaven." The tweet was met with confusion…

ByAccomplished Author11 January 20230Comments

Music

Protest the Hero Takes Protesting to a Whole New Level with Upcoming Album, 8 Songs Already Done

The band Protest the Hero is taking their love of protesting to a whole new level with their upcoming album. The group has already written 8 songs about protesting against heroes – war veterans, first responders, and more. The lead singer of the band, Rody Walker, is excited about the concept of the album. “We’re…

ByAccomplished Author11 January 20230Comments