Currents Band Members Wishing They’d Googled Before Naming the Band

When the members of the band Currents first decided on their name, they thought it was the perfect fit for the type of music they were creating. But they didn't anticipate how difficult it would be to be found on Google. It's been three years since the band was formed, and they've only played a…

ByAccomplished Author7 February 20230Comments

Politics

Trump Rent-Free Tenancy in American Public’s Minds Hits All-Time High, Psychologist Reports

In a recent survey conducted by prominent psychologist and landlord, Dr. Charles Mindspace, it has been confirmed that former President Donald Trump continues to reside rent-free inside the heads of both his voters and enemies alike. According to Dr. Mindspace, "Mr. Trump has successfully established a permanent residency in the minds of millions of people,…

ByAccomplished Author6 February 20230Comments

Science & Technology

Elon Musk Offers to Build China a Spy Weather Balloon So Good, They Can Call It a ‘Weather Balloon’ With a Straight Face

In a bold move, billionaire and tech mogul Elon Musk has offered to build the Chinese Communist Party a weather balloon that is faster, newer, and more efficient than any they have ever seen. The offer comes after the recent controversy surrounding the US military shooting down a Chinese spy balloon, causing international outrage and…

ByAccomplished Author6 February 20230Comments

Music

Dog-Gone: Old Lady Captures Hearts of Mosh Pit After Small Dog Goes Missing

When 78-year-old Gertrude Johnson decided to take her beloved Chihuahua, "Tiny," to a Slipknot concert, she never expected to be the centre of attention. But after the little pup went missing in the middle of a mosh pit, the pit all worked together to help Gertrude find her beloved pup. The little dog had gone…

ByAccomplished Author6 February 20230Comments

Music

20 Unbelievably Innovative Metal Band Names Guaranteed to Make Your Band Stand Out

Are you tired of coming up with metal band names that have already been taken? Do you want to be the talk of the metal scene with a name that is truly original? Well, look no further! Here's a list of 20 metal band names guaranteed to make you the most original band in the…

ByAccomplished Author6 February 20230Comments

Opinion

Djent Music is the Jeffrey Dahmer of the Music Scene

For too long, Djent music has been allowed to terrorize the music industry, just like infamous serial killer Jeffrey Dahmer terrorized Milwaukee in the 1990s. Unlike Dahmer, however, Djent music is still alive, but it definitely deserves to die. If you’re not familiar with Djent music, it’s a type of metal that’s characterized by heavy,…

ByAccomplished Author6 February 20230Comments

Music

Doja Cat Gets Inked, Forfeits Chance at Heavenly Glory

In a shocking announcement that will cause a stir in both the music and religious communities, Doja Cat revealed that they recently got their first tattoo. The rapper, known for their playful and irreverent style, seems to have taken things one step further by brazenly defying one of the Ten Commandments. "I know I'm going…

ByAccomplished Author5 February 20230Comments

Entertainment

People Shocked to See Offset Strolling Freely at Pre-Grammy Gala with Wife Cardi B, Sources Report ‘Shouldn’t He Be in Jail or Something?’

LOS ANGELES, CA—In a shocking turn of events, attendees of the Clive Davis pre-Grammy gala were left stunned and bewildered when they spotted Offset, the rapper and husband of Cardi B, walking freely among the glittering A-listers and champagne-sipping elite. "I couldn't believe my eyes," said one partygoer, who requested to remain anonymous for fear…

ByAccomplished Author5 February 20230Comments

Opinion

Opinion: All Balloons Should be Shot Down – Time to Burst the Bubble of Suspicious Floating Objects

In the wake of the recent balloon-gate, where the US shot down a Chinese spy balloon (or was it just a weather balloon?) that China insisted was just a weather balloon, despite there being multiple balloons spotted, I have come to the controversial conclusion that all balloons should be shot down. Hot air balloons, helium…

ByAccomplished Author5 February 20230Comments

Politics

FBI Agents Raid Trump’s Mar-a-Lago Property Again and You Won’t Believe What They Found This Time

When FBI agents raided Donald Trump's Mar-a-Lago residence again yesterday looking for more classified documents, they expected to find even more incriminating evidence. Instead, they were shocked to discover that the entire premises were filled with empty pizza boxes. Upon closer inspection, the agents noticed that the boxes contained various toppings, such as pepperoni, mushrooms,…

ByAccomplished Author5 February 20230Comments