Elvis Costello is getting sick and tired of telling people, “No, I’m not that Elvis. You’re thinking of the other Elvis.”

Despite his impressive musical career and numerous accolades, the legendary singer-songwriter is constantly overshadowed by the other Elvis, who just happened to be a little more successful. "It's like, come on people, use your Google!" exclaimed Costello in a recent interview with Rolling Stone. "I mean, I appreciate that the other Elvis was a music…

ByAccomplished Author7 June 20230Comments

Entertainment

Lies Exposed: Stevie T admits Jared Dines is a fictional character he created for content ideas

In a shocking twist of events, it has been revealed that internet sensation and YouTube guitar guru, Stevie T, has been lying to us all this time. In a recent interview, Stevie admitted that the popular metal YouTuber Jared Dines is, in fact, a figment of his imagination. The truth came to light after Stevie…

ByAccomplished Author6 June 20230Comments

Music

Metallica Fans Left Stunned As Lars Ulrich Shocks Audience By Removing Prosthetic Limb From Orphan Child During St. Anger Performance

Metallica fans were shocked during the band’s most recent concert after Lars Ulrich stunned the audience by removing a prosthetic limb from an orphan child and using it to play St. Anger. The incident occurred during the band’s performance of St. Anger at the Rogers Arena in Vancouver, Canada. As the song started, Lars Ulrich…

ByAccomplished Author5 June 20230Comments

Music

Wake Dollar: The Band That Hides Behind Masks Because They’re All Cancelled Musicians

Filed under: not Sleep Token Up-and-coming band Wake Dollar has decided to hide behind masks at all times in order to conceal the fact that they're made up entirely of cancelled musicians from other bands. "We realized that we were all struggling to find work in the music industry because of our checkered pasts," said…

ByAccomplished Author4 June 20230Comments

Music

Slipknot Finally Admits: We’re Not Actually a Band About Tying Knots

After years of confusion and misunderstandings, Slipknot, the Grammy-award-winning heavy metal band, has finally come clean about their true identity. In a shocking press conference held yesterday, lead vocalist Corey Taylor announced that Slipknot is not, in fact, a band about tying knots. "We've been living a lie for far too long," Taylor said. "It's…

ByAccomplished Author3 June 20230Comments

Music

Lorna Shore Conspiracy Revealed: Band Just a Group of Robots Controlled by the Government

It turns out that the deathcore band Lorna Shore is not made up of flesh and blood human beings but rather a group of advanced robots controlled by the government. Sources close to the band, who wished to remain anonymous due to fear of being turned into scrap metal, revealed that the "members" of Lorna…

ByAccomplished Author2 June 20230Comments

Music

Mike Tyson’s ‘Wise’ Insight into the Music Industry Leaves Everyone Baffled

After an in-depth interview with the legendary Mike Tyson, it appears the only insight he had to offer into the future of the music industry was a series of grunts and unintelligible noises. Despite our best attempts to decipher his words, we are still uncertain about his meaning. When asked to comment on the industry's…

ByAccomplished Author1 June 20230Comments

Music

EPIC FAIL: Periphery Plays Entire Gig Without Realizing Their Instruments Were Replaced With a Macbook Pro

Periphery recently performed an entire gig without realizing that their instruments had been mysteriously replaced with a Macbook Pro. The band had just begun their set at the sold-out venue when two mysterious figures, who were later identified as tech wizards, appeared on stage and unplugged all of the band's instruments. Without missing a beat,…

ByAccomplished Author31 May 20230Comments

Music

System of A Down Announces Surprise Album: ‘Yoga for Beginners’

The popular alternative metal band System of A Down has announced a surprise new album, titled 'Yoga for Beginners.' The album will be released on April Fool's Day, though the band insists it is no joke. Lead singer Serj Tankian shared a brief statement about the upcoming album: "We wanted to do something a little…

ByAccomplished Author30 May 20230Comments

Life & Style

Wholesome: This Small-Town Cop Doesn’t Shoot Unarmed Civilians

In the small, sleepy town of Squeezyville, Officer Ronald Jones has been uniquely keeping the peace. Officer Jones' approach to policing differs from his colleagues in other towns, as he has managed to maintain order without the use of lethal force. His colleagues taunt him, but he doesn't mind. "You're not a real cop if…

ByAccomplished Author29 May 20230Comments