In the hallowed halls of Harvard University, where knowledge pours from every corner like a perpetual coffee machine, an unprecedented study has rocketed out of the academic stratosphere. This study…
The makers of Axe body spray have long kept a secret from American consumers, leaving them in the dark to bask in the intoxicating fumes of prepubescent desperation blindly. Recent…
Nashville, TN – In an unprecedented move with fans reaching for their extinguishers, Kings of Leon announced today their plans for a one-night-only concert experience that will ignite your loins.…
Just when you thought the yo-yo antics of tech moguls couldn't get any more nausea-inducing, here comes our favorite silicon valley chameleon, Brad Barkley, to prove us all wrong. You…
Atlanta, GA - In a display of woke gone wrong social media solidarity, Twitter users have banded together to cancel André 3000, the beloved musician and one-half of the iconic…
Los Angeles, CA - As the sun set on the glamorous land of Hollywood, a new pariah was birthed out of the shallow depths of celebrity culture. This time, we're…
Tampa Bay, FL - In a textbook demonstration of utter denial, local software engineer Mike McGonagall insisted with a straight face that his supposedly bug-free code was "working just fine"…
Dewsbury, West Yorkshire, 1995 - Buckle up, buttercups. It's Friday night, and it's about to get wild. The scent of your mom's lasagna is still wafting from the kitchen, but…
Fasten your seatbelts, pasta enthusiasts; we've got a saucy scoop that will change the way you view your favorite faux-Italian casual dining chain: Olive Garden, long rumored to be the…
In the world of Silicon Valley, where the unsung heroes of our time, the programmers, dwell amidst RGB-lit mechanical keyboards and overpriced, fair-trade, gluten-free, vegan, artisanal coffee, a rebellion is…