2023 - Page 8 of 67

Lorde of the Rings No More: New Zealand Revokes Lorde’s Citizenship After Singer’s Cinematic Blasphemy

New Zealand has stripped singer Lorde of her citizenship after she publicly declared that the Lord of the Rings movies are "absolute rubbish." In a desperate attempt to salvage their…

Life & Style

Keanu Reeves Revs Up Appetites with Fiery Motorcycle Entrance at Swanky Italian Eatery

Rome, Italy - Hollywood heartthrob Keanu Reeves shocked patrons at the upscale Italian restaurant, "Il Veloce e il Gustoso," by making a grand entrance on his roaring motorcycle. Diners were…

Life & Style

Wendy’s Boldly Dares IRS to ‘Make Them’ Pay Taxes: A Fast Food Revolution in the Works?

CHICAGO, IL - It's a good old-fashioned game of chicken, with a side of fries, as Wendy's, the beloved fast food chain, has issued a daring challenge to the Internal…

Music

Butch Vig Spills the Beans: Nirvana’s Secret Obsession with Celine Dion Finally Exposed

Los Angeles, CA - Hold on to your ripped jeans and flannel, folks, because renowned music producer Butch Vig just dropped a grunge-busting bombshell that's guaranteed to shatter your '90s…

Politics

Operation ‘I Can’t Quit the Drone Life’: Former President Barack Obama Literally Hits the Ground Running, Trading in Golf Clubs for Bomber Drone Joysticks

If you thought former President Barack Obama had all his bases covered after leaving the White House, think again! Just when you thought those sandy Hawaiian beaches could satiate his…

Entertainment

Equality! All-Female LGBTQI+ Titanic Reboot Set to Sink the Patriarchy!

In what is being labelled as a ground-breaking feminist achievement, Hollywood has announced an all-female, LGBTQI+-inclusive reboot of the classic 1997 film Titanic. This revolutionary narrative update will chart the…

Entertainment

Federal Reserve Declares Swiftian Economy: ‘Tay-Tay is our New Gold Standard,’ Claims Non-Tour Cities are Doomed!

In a world where pop music is the new gold standard, America's sweetheart Taylor Swift is now the unofficial poster child for economic prosperity. The Federal Reserve, a body that…

Quizes

Is Your Mechanic Ripping You Off? Take This Quiz to Find Out!

You pull up to the auto shop for a routine check-up, and your mechanic, with his hands covered in grease, gives you some concerning news. He tells you your "indicator…

Music

A Whiff of Wellness: Tom Morello Confesses to Smelling His Own Farts for Holistic Healing

Tom Morello has come forth with a bizarre yet oddly endearing admission: He sniffs his own farts in pursuit of holistic health benefits. Morello, best known for his legendary riffs…

Politics

BREAKING: Puppet Masters Caught Red-Handed as Joe Biden’s Speech Reveals Obvious String Attachments!

WASHINGTON, D.C. – The mystery surrounding President Joe Biden's seemingly unnatural movements and speeches has finally been answered! During a particularly heated political discourse, eagle-eyed spectators noticed the curious sight…