Ah, Avenged Sevenfold. The band churning out rock anthems since the dawn of time (or at least the early 2000s) has graced us with their latest opus, “Life is But a Dream…”. Just when you thought it was safe to put away your air guitar and start taking life seriously, they’ve unleashed this 12-track extraterrestrial juggernaut that redefines the phrase “so bad it’s good.”
If you are hoping for a return to the glory days of Avenged Sevenfold, you are in the wrong place. This album is clearly focused on a subset of fans who love the constitution, believe in aliens and love buying NFTs. Still, there might be something for you on this album.
Let’s dive into the tracklisting, shall we?
- Game Over — This opening track finds Avenged Sevenfold tackling the age-old question, “Why is there no ‘We the People’ in the game of life?” With its catchy chorus, “Game over, man, game over, can’t you see the Constitution’s on fire?”, you’ll be questioning your life choices alongside them.
- Mattel — In what can only be described as a love letter to their favorite toy manufacturer, Mattel, Avenged Sevenfold takes us on a wild ride through the magical world of Barbie and Ken dolls. The stunning lyric, “Riding plastic horses into the sunset, my Bill of Rights is tattered and torn,” will be stuck in your head for days.
- Nobody — “Nobody” seems to be an existential crisis set to music. With lines like “I’m nobody, I’m nothing, I’m just a cosmic speck in the eyes of an alien,” this track will have you questioning your very existence.
- We Love You — The band breaks from their deep, thought-provoking lyrics in “We Love You,” which consists entirely of repeating the phrase “We love you, like, a lot.” If you’re into that sort of thing, this song is for you.
- Cosmic — “Cosmic” finds the band exploring their love for astronomy and conspiracy theories. With its chorus, “Aliens, man, they’re in the Constitution, they’re controlling our minds, can’t you see?”, it’s clear that Avenged Sevenfold is not afraid to tackle the tough issues.
- Beautiful Morning — This track attempts to be a heartfelt ballad. Still, the lyrics “Waking up to a beautiful morning, with the Second Amendment in my hand, and an alien in my bed” really takes it to a whole new level of absurdity.
- Easier — In “Easier,” the band reflects on their career, singing “Life used to be easier when we just played guitar and didn’t have to think about the Constitution or aliens.” It’s a sentiment we can all relate to, I’m sure.
- G — Just when you thought the album couldn’t get any stranger, “G” comes along. This instrumental track consists of one “G” note repeatedly played for four minutes. A bold artistic choice but not necessarily a wise one.
- (O)rdinary — “Ordinary” life is the theme of this track, with lyrics like “I just want to be ordinary, not an alien abductee, fighting for my constitutional rights.” It’s a catchy tune, but the message may be too deep for most listeners.
- (D)eath — The band goes full death metal in “(D)eath,” a headbanger’s dream come true. The guttural screams of “Death to the alien overlords, I want my constitutional rights back!” will surely get your blood pumping.
- Life is But a Dream… — The final track, “Life is But a Dream…,” is a bizarre, genre-bending fever dream combining jazz, country, and polka elements. The lyrics, “Life is but a dream, a cosmic joke, a constitutional mess, and an alien’s playground,” perfectly summarize the album’s overall theme. It’s a fitting end to an album that can only be described as a roller coaster ride through the outer reaches of musical insanity.
“Life is But a Dream…” is an album that defies all logic and reason. It’s a wild, hilarious journey into the minds of a band that has decided to throw caution to the wind and create an album that is, at best, an acquired taste. If you’re a fan of Avenged Sevenfold, aliens, the Constitution, or just plain old absurdity, you might find some moments to enjoy. But for most, this album will leave you shaking your head and wondering what they were thinking.
It gets a solid 2.5 extraterrestrial constitutions out of five. While there are some laughably entertaining moments, it’s not quite the musical masterpiece one might hope for. However, the sheer absurdity of the album does provide a certain level of charm if you’re into that sort of thing.
