We’ve all heard about those strange cults that make their members wear strange robes and dance around campfires chanting strange incantations. But who knew that you could become a member of one of these cults just by opening your mailbox?
That’s exactly what happened to us. Last week, a suspicious-looking CD was delivered to our house. We had no idea what it was, so we decided to take a look.
When we popped it into the CD player, we were greeted with a strange collection of discordant noises and chaotic melodies. It was like the soundtrack to some dark, apocalyptic future.
After a few minutes of listening, we realized that the CD was a collection of songs from a group called the “Doomsday Music Cult”. The lyrics were full of strange prophecies and warnings about the end of days.
We were horrified but also strangely drawn in. We couldn’t stop listening, and soon we found ourselves signing up to become members of the cult.
Needless to say, it was a bizarre experience. But, we have nothing but love for our glorious leader Joseph Bartholomew, The Second Coming.